Small updates

Late last week a small batch of items showed up overnight on the tenant’s front porch. It could only have been from our AN and his wife. Included were two oak card catalog drawers, and keys with my name on them. I looked closely at the picture the tenants sent and for sure the drawers were my father’s. The dymo labels in the upper left corners and the drawer linings were the giveaway. The additional items, in a box, are a bit of a mystery, but we’ll be there in a week and figure it out.

Today I found out, via a Redfin email, that their house sold on the 17th. Not 15-minutes later our AN ‘butt’ dialed me! I called him back and we talked for 20-minutes. They’ve already moved, and arrived to their new home to discover that a leak in the fridge line had been flooding the house for 2 (TWO!) months. This happened when the cleaners pulled out the fridge to clean and the water line to the ice maker broke. It must have been a slow leak as the cleaners didn’t see it. The insurance company is taking care of everything, including lodging in an assisted living community as our AN is wheelchair bound. They’re quite satisfied with the response. But what a way to start on your new adventure.

We had my MIL over for dinner this evening. There were two highlights. The first was watching her and my DH going through many of the items she’d saved from his childhood. Letters written from summer camp, drawings, paintings. It was really lovely to observe them laughing and reminiscing 💜. The second was that we arranged a Zoom call with her best friends from college. Reasonably, my DH was concerned that she might not twig to a video call. She did great! And it was Wonderful to be part of the conversation, to support her, and soak up the love that exists between these three friend.

There were the usual repeated statements and questions, but nothing we haven’t heard before and nothing uncomfortable. I am still working on separating my mom and MIL in terms of how their illness effect/ed them, and then me. It’s two fold… I was my mom’s only child, and mom was mom. A double whammy. All of mom’s ire and anxiety was focused on me. My MIL doesn’t exhibit either of those traits, and she is focused on her son. Yet my internal response is still what I had when I was trying guide my mom through this. Fight or flight… Intellect is overcoming emotion with consistent experience, and always having the ability to leave a gathering independently.