Mom left two voicemails today, and then I called her…
- Voicemail #1: “What’s up for Thanksgiving? If you told me, I didn’t write it down. I’d like to have confirmation if you’ll be picking me up. I’ll be out for the next hour, hour and a half. If you could call between 7:30 and 8:00, that’d be great….” Usual sign off
- Voicemail #2 (Sounding snippy as hell): “I called you earlier. I’m sure you got my message and I’d like to hear from you. It’d be very helpful. I’m at the usual number.” No sign off.
- I called mom on speaker phone (best not to be ‘alone’ in conversation with her). As always, I said, “I’m returning your call!” This time she was on it. She asked about our Thanksgiving plans. I gently reminded her we’d had Thanksgiving last week. We talked about how early in the month the holiday was (giving her an in-the-moment out). She asked what I’d been up to today (digging into why I hadn’t returned her calls, or answered the phone), and then what was happening in general. As I answered her questions she suddenly took a left turn, as though she was replying to something I said. “Brian, the Boss Man (Brian is the facility manager, not Mac the GM) says he’s going to up my rate to full retail. The doctor told me recently, or weeks, maybe months ago that I don’t need to be here. And there’s no reason for me to be here.. (repeated this a few times). To get him off my ass I need to get back to the mainland house right away. Then stay there for the holidays. What’s it going to take to get my furniture back to the Island? A mover? (I answered in the affirmative, and then said we’d talk about plans). She started down the path again, and what little actress inhabits me piped up with, “Mom, My DH just said dinner is ready! We’ll talk soon.” She rolled with this, wishing me a cheerful goodnight.
Going forward I think I can, sans stress, deal with mom talking about returning to the Island as long as we’re on the phone. There’s always an understandable need to get off the phone. Handling this takes baby steps some days.