Tracking Down My Parent’s Contemporaries

I got out the direct (email) announcements for my folk’s celebration of life this week. I knew there would be some email bounces. But only seven! Today I rounded up four email addys, decided to snail mail one, am waiting for a mutual friend to chime in with another, and had to dig harder with the seventh.

I decided to make a phone call… This was to the daughter of one of my mom’s most important authors. Someone answered, but not Beatrice. It turned out it was the new owner of their former southern CA home. I had figured out they had sold the house, but was super surprised to have the new owner answer the phone. She shared that the community had a hotel like exchange system (!), so the phone number came with the house. We had a short chat where she referred me to her neighbor who knew my mom’s author’s daughter. She said she’d call and let the neighbor know I’d be calling, which I did this afternoon. During our brief conversation, she let me know the husband had passed some years ago, and asked if she could call me back as someone was at her door. ‘Of course,’ I said.

ALL this to say how interesting, and perfectly normal, it is to find that your parent’s friends, colleagues, and acquaintances have passed on. In the absence of my parents, certainly many of their people and I haven’t kept in touch. I want to send them the announcement of the gathering as a courtesy, not because I anticipate they’d come to a dinky Island with spotty ferry service. This couple were more than ancillary people in my parent’s life. They were friends, visited each other, and me, and after my father’s passing, she called me frequently to ask how my mom was doing, particularly after concerning conversations with my mom. It’s poignant to understand that her husband has passed and to not know where or how she is. Hopefully I’ll find out soon.